Having decided to decline my offer for a study abroad next year, today the sudden realisation hit me that my time at uni was almost over. Okay, not almost over, but I was already over halfway through. How could this be?!
As my end of second year creeps ever closer and the amount of catching up I need to do before my summer exams is becoming more evident, I thought to myself: What has university actually taught me? Because goddamn it it’s definitely not which drugs treat neurodegenerative diseases or how gastric acid secretion is regulated or the function of lactate dehydrogenase or anything else that I actually came here to learn.
The odd things university has taught me I can’t imagine having learnt anywhere else. And are somewhat unexpected. So here’s 20 things university has taught me so far:
1. Napping is essential.
2. No matter how poor you are, you’ll always be able to afford alcohol.
3. Cheese is stupidly overpriced.
4. You can leave everything until the last minute is: A 1500 word essay? Check. How to get dolled up in half an hour? Pft, easy.
5. In fact, it is actually possible to be lazier than you were at school.
6. Tequila and Jager bombs are your two best friends.
7. You know exactly where to find £1 pints and £2.50 triples.
8. Budgeting always fails.
9. Convincing yourself you’ll try harder and attend all lectures next semester is doomed for failure.
10. Starting TV series near to exam period is dangerous territory.
11. Most of the time you’ve no clue what is going on.
12. People that don’t flush to toilet not only exist, but you have to live with them.
13. No matter how full the bin looks, there’s always room for one more thing.
14. Required textbooks are never actually required.
15. Never ever ever take toilet roll for granted.
16. Groupwork is the bane of your life.
17. Cutlery goes missing and no one knows why, but that’s okay.
18. Procrastination is the most powerful force out there.
19. All-nighters are away of life.
20. Sleep, social life and good grades do not go together. You can only choose to have two of the three.